“The Choice” & ”Zoolander
really going to review these? You
didn’t even like them. Why bother?
but don’t I need to tell the people they’d be wasting their
that’s a judgment call. Let
them evaluate for themselves. What
was so wrong, anyway?
Id: “The Choice” was the really schmaltzy
love story, told in such an old-fashioned way that there was no sex,
no foul language, no nudity, and nothing more violent than one swift
punch to the jaw between love-triangle rivals.
In other words, nothing of any scintillating interest at all.
don’t have to show skin in order to prove sexual attraction.
such a prude.
prefer love stories where people keep their clothes on, thank you.
It’s so much more dignified.
here they’re dignified to the point of being stiff, like they’re
posing their way through it.
dogs were cute.
cutesy overweening to the max. At
least “Zoolander 2” doesn’t insult your intelligence.
you kidding? That
so-called farce was so over-the-top that it was completely
was the whole point. They
were making fun of the whole modeling shtick, the Hollywood fashion
industry, even superhero porn.
were definitely a lot of cameos by celebrities as diverse as Willie
Nelson and John Malkovich.
but who wants to see Benedict Cumberbatch as a drag queen?
And who would really believe that Owen Wilson and Ben Stiller
are, or even were, supermodels?
the whole point. It’s
random and ridiculous because so is the whole celebrity cult.
the people who have most profited by it are the ones lampooning it?
Cruz was hot. Didn’t
know she had a talent for tongue-in-cheek humor.
Ego: Now that she’s and established star over
40, she can afford to branch out.
the Kristen Wiig floating face was also ridiculous, with the
exaggerated botox, she looked like a witch.
think that was the point, too. The
celebrity cult making fun of its own excesses.
you can have the whole silly diatribe.
It wasn’t even funny.
because you don’t understand or appreciate farce in the first
any time we spent on these was wasted.
wanna go to the movies?
Dr. Ronald P. Salfen, DFW Film Critics